Archive for July, 2010

Jag ligger kvar här, så blir nog allting bra…

Okay, so, I decided not to go to Malmö this fall after all. I still feel like going somewhere, but I don’t think I’m ready yet. It just occured to me that, if I go away to a place where I don’t know anyone and nobody knows me, sure it would be a new start and all that and it would probably be a great experience, but… if something were to happen, something bad, then I would have to go through that all alone. And I don’t know if I could do that. And that scares me. I hate being scared. I don’t want to, but I’m just too weak to not be scared. I don’t want to hide in my room all day, but I’m too afraid to go outside. Sometimes I hate being a little girl… I hate not being able to defend myself… I’m pathetic.
Jag ligger kvar här, så blir nog allting bra…

Oh well enough complaining. Sorry about that. I thought I’d upload
some pictures from my trip to Japan earlier this year. I miss it so much!

(Sorry Linnea if you’re reading this, I stole your pictures 8)

Face in the crowd

I know that you’re never gonna’ be just a face in the crowd.. (Never stop looking at me)
I saw a movie on TV yesterday. and I swear to god it felt like I was watching my life on repeat.
and it also felt like I got a sneakpeak of what is to come. but I’m not sure witch part I played.
It made me feel sick. I don’t really know why.
If you believe in love at first sight, you never stop looking

I think I lack some emotions.. most of the time it feels like someone has put a filter or
something on my emotions. or just lowered the opacity. it al feels so blurry. Usually
I lack emotions like sympathy and empathy. I understands these feelings very well,
but I can’t feel them. It disturbs me. I can still feel guilt though.
But it doesn’t help. it just makes me feel like the worst person in the world.
was I always this messed up..?

Doh, now I did it again. filling my blog with stupid thoughts. Anyway,

“Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.”

Funk-a-delic

Hello, what in the world is up! It has rained all day, so I’ve stayed inside and studied.
But oh do I love this course I’m taking. I get to draw all day!
So today I finished my character design that was my assignment for this week.
As well as the PROP assignment I posted here before, my character design is
also very steampunk-inspired. I didn’t have much time left to do the background though,
so it is more of a speed-painting. But I was more interested in getting the right feeling
for the picture instead of drawing a very detailed background.

I know the perspective is a bit off for the PROP, but I didn’t have time to draw a new one so… whatever!

Ambitions

Hello again. I thought I’d post some more pictures of my dreads. Since they’ll probably be gone soon. Summer is also coming to an end. makes me sad. I don’t want it to end. Also, I got in to a design program. but… it’s in Malmö. so if I want to go there, I have to move to Malmö. and I need to decide soon. I don’t know if I want to go or not.. I hate deciding… I don’t want to make the wrong choises.. can’t somebody just tell me what’s right…

And if somebody’s going to make it
then this somebody ought to be you
And I keep telling my reflection
Ambitions are already starting to fade

Divine Moments Of Truth

Hello, I’m back from Arvikafestivalen! It was messy. It rained almost all the time, there was mud everywhere and everyone was totally wasted. but I had a great time. I saw a lot of bands I wanted to see, and discovered a lot of new ones.

Anyway, I thought I’d post an outfit since I haven’t done that for a while.

I like my dreads. But I have to dye my hair again soon, so I guess they’ll have to come off eventually…

Allting kommer bli bra till slut

Du ska se att allting ordnar sig.
Ok so I’m off to Arvikafestivalen so I’ll be away for a week or so.
Peppar Den Svenska Björnstammen, Maskinen, Regina Spektor, and lots more!

Also I figured I’d post some things I’ve been woring on for my summer course in Concept Art.
Moodboard assignment for the female protagonist.

Prop assignment. I made a hoverbike.

I wonder if love is like lightning..?

Dreadhead

Why can’t the universe give me a break?
Maybe ’cause I don’t deserve it…
Everything is upside down and inside out.
I don’t know what’s right or wrong anymore.
I don’t know anything. I’m lost.
I deleted my facebook account again.
it feels necessary. it doesn’t feel right, but it feels necessary.

Oh and I have dreads now. only synthetic though. but I like ‘em.

I’m tumbling. I’m falling upside down. I think I’m doing the right thing. Bur why does it feel so wrong?

Cupcake Paintings

Hello, I’m sorry for not updating my blog for a while >_>
I’ve been away for some time to the great woods of Värmland! ….. or.. well..
anyway, it was nice. I needed some vacation.
While I was there I finished some comissions: 3 cupcake paintings.
I made them with spray paint, acrylic paint and markers.

These paintings are already sold, but I do take comissions.
If you are interested in some paintings, please let me know.